Batman is my favorite super hero, but they've rebooted the character so many times I get confused, and have had 5 or 6 Robins. Most people are familiar with the Dick Grayson version of Robin... when they're talking about Batman's sidekick (and who doesn't talk about Batman's sidekick?) that's who they mean. They most recent version of The Boy Wonder is Damian Wayne, the 10 year old son of Bruce "Batman" Wayne and Talia al Ghul.
DC Comics killed off Robin this week. I did NOT see this coming. Then I wondered, "What ELSE don't I know about the Caped Crusader?" And I was up all night researching these . . . Top Secrets of Batman.
--One of the compartments in his utility belt is filled with grocery store club cards.
--When he flicks his wrist just right, his Batarang returns with a pair of sorority girl's panties.
--He has a Batmobile, Bat-copter, Bat-plane AND a Bat-Sybian.
--He recently got the left ear on his cowl pierced with a hipster lobe stud.
--When he first heard DC was getting rid of a gay superhero, he said, "They're killing Aquaman?!?"
--He recently replaced his Bat-boots with a pair of those tacky barefoot running shoes.
--Alfred didn't stop bathing him until he was 25.
--At last year's superhero Christmas party, he got drunk and barebacked Mr. Fantastic.
--His cape is made from 100% sustainable, free-trade organic cotton. Are you happy, hippies?
--The Bat-Suit was made from the same indestructible compound scientists used to construct Matt Lauer.
--The Batcycle originally came with a sidecar big enough to hold Robin, a "Bat-Cannon" and a massive helping of homoeroticism.
--Every night, he dreams of one day dropping the playfully antagonistic façade and finally making sweet love to Alfred.
--As a true American hero, his next mission is murdering Halle Berry before she can make another "Catwoman" movie.
--He doesn't really have superpowers. Unless you count being able to hear "Pumped Up Kicks" without it getting stuck in his head for the rest of the day.
--At home he wears JUST the cape.
